you, who i used to know

when the sun sets at night,

and i finally close my eyes

(takes  all my might),

when i’m finally over all my daytime cries,

it’s your face i see

there in the quiet

it’s you and me

suddenly, in my brain there’s a riot

peace is gone

freedom is lost

i press my eyes shut and wait for dawn

for this hell to exhaust

you soothe me

while you steal my life

you whisper “just let it be”

your touch is a stinging knife

it was our little secret

and until now, i’ve told no one

have i betrayed the trust you set

upon me?

telling burned like the sun

they call it ptsd,

all the dreams and all the fears

i call it you leaving me

how could you make me keep it inside, all these years?

where did you go

 

you, who i used to know.

 

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